First, a little bit about what my weekends have looked like when I’m not gigging. We’ve been running to every farm, orchard, and spooky fun event we can find that fits around the doggies schedules and mine. I have five imps on the cusp of adulthood, so I’m as busy as a bee. One wants to sew his own costume, one wants to go shopping for his, another isn’t certain he is dressing up, and my oldest boy wants to wear his (with full make-up) to work… guess I’ll be face painting, too. My eldest will probably be going out and IDK what she’ll be wearing, but she has the make-up part down no matter what it will be.
It’s only two weeks until Halloween and I couldn’t be more excited! I love watching all the children in costumes and spooky fun with things like Fright Fest at Six Flags, Haunted Houses, Trunk or Treat events, and as a psychic reader(told you I was a professional entertainer) I love doing lots of fun parties. It’s a great way to meet and greet and of course use some of my talents-highly satisfying for me.
Octoberfest Celebration
In November, everything begins to slow down as enter the holiday season, so this is really the last chance to kick up your heels. The farms and orchards are full of produce. Craft stores are full of spooky odds and ends that will probably end up on my shelves and around the house, because we’re spooky all year at home. It’s like a month long Mardi Gras for me and I love every moment of it.
Those apples are almost black, but so delicious!
Spoils of war, well… they had to find some with green that were low enough to pick. The tarter the better.
Look at all those pumpkins! I can almost smell the pumpkin bread.
While I wait for my water to boil for a cup of tea, I’m going to tell you what just happened- my newest book Knot A Psychic is now available on paperback and Audiobook in addition to Kindle on Amazon. Everything went through so quickly, I suspect they are using A.I. As an IT, I’m not a fan of A.I. endeavors. There are uses for the technology, but every gain comes with some risk, so be careful. No A.I.’s were harmed in the making of any of my books. When I run out of ideas, I take a long walk with my dogs and inspiration finds me. I like to flesh out my characters in my head first before committing them to Word and arguing with it about the spellings. Yes, culantro is a word. It’s an herb in Puerto Rican cooking often autocorrected to cilantro, grr! But more on cooking later.
In any case, despite my unseen arguments with technology, I’ve been writing code since 1986 and am now covering DOS commands with my son who is studying IT since many of the Linux/Unix commands are the same. Being a geek for a kid completely paid off and I hope he finds his passion in computer security. The hard part is to land that first IT job.
My mind is wandering today. I have six books to continue working on but I’m thinking about Monkey Bread and candy apples, or maybe candy apple topped monkey bread-that might be over the top sweet. A girl has her vices, and even on the diabetic diet I do eat carbs, I just count them.
Let’s do this. I’m going to post a recipe below for the quickest easiest Monkey Bread you’ll ever make, instead of a cocktail this week. Even the hubby comes running for this one.
Easy Monkey Bread
Supplies:
Bundt pan
Large Mixing Bowl
Kitchen Scissors
Ceramic bowl
Knife
Cutting board
Oven- sorry no microwaves for this recipe
Ingredients:
1-2 tart apples (if you got a huge apple 1 is plenty)
3 canisters your favorite oven bake biscuits
1 1/2 cups sugar (I use 3/4 cup organic raw sugar and 3/4 cup brown sugar, but whatever you prefer will work)
2 teaspoons powdered Ceylon cinnamon
2 sticks unsalted butter (1 cup butter spread if you’re watching your fats)
Here’s what to do:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit
Melt Butter in ceramic bowl in microwave-a few seconds at a time until liquid-save the wrappers to grease your Bundt pan. if you are making a bigger batch, you can freeze your butter wrappers for next time to need to grease something.
Add butter, sugar, and cinnamon to mixing bowl and give it a good stir
Cut your biscuits into fourths or smaller and add to the mixing bowl, try and coat all the pieces in that buttery sweet cinnamon goodness
Core and dice your apple(s) and add to the mixing bowl. If you don’t like apple peels, you can remove them before dicing.
Stir everything in the bowl until well combined and dump into your Bundt pan.
Place the Bundt pan in a well heated oven and bake for 25-35 minutes until golden brown and well caramelized. It is okay to over bake this a little if you’re afraid it won’t turn out nicely. An alternative is using a lined and greased bread pan-parchment paper. It has gotten me out of a lot of sticky situations.
Let cool slightly.
Turn out your Bundt cake onto a ceramic plate and serve warm.
If you are looking to be completely decadent serve with vanilla ice cream or your favorite cream cheese icing.
Sometimes it takes a while to get to get the e-books up and approved, but this one sailed through. I’m hoping the paperback will be released soon, but in the meantime I’m so excited to share this with you.
Knot A Psychic, is book number 9 of the All Tied Up In Knots Series. It is the third full length book and a crossover book between the All Tied Up In Knots Series and the Help Wanted Romance Series (supernatural & monster books). I wanted a fun way to mix things things up in time for Halloween, so I hope you love this book as much as I do.
Many of you know me from my side job as a Psychic Reader. I’ve always had a love of all things carnival. I think I have Seaside Heights and Six Flags to blame for my cheap thrills addiction. Now, I chase carnivals, whether its for the beautiful belly dancers, clever balloon twisters, candy floss (cotton candy) and sweet makers, henna artists, or other entertainers who knows, I love them all.
Having worked with many other entertainers over the years has given me some insight into the personalities behind the performance. Instead of killing the magic, it has done the opposite and I often find myself making pilgrimages to one faire or another for the rush of adrenaline fueled by thrill rides and excited screams.
My children are equally big on cheap thrills and we get season passes for places I know they’ll stay from the time they open until they shut down for the night. Whether it’s a magician or the thrill of lit up carnival rides after dark that get’s you, you know that feeling of excitement.
Before the big venues shut down for the season, I’m going to go on one more roller coaster (as soon as the weather lifts) and maybe have one last candy apple before Halloween.
Now, back to the book… Knot A Psychic
Here is the blurb:
Mystic, psychic reader extraordinaire, can help everyone else with their troubles but is completely lost when it comes to her own messy life. Her whisperers offer advice but she can’t force people to bend themselves to her will and change the future for the better. It cost her the love of her life, Mike, because he refused to listen to her pleas and succumbed to injuries caused by a motorcycle accident. Bereft, Mystic decides to live her life out alone, away from people.
Johnathon Riley convinces him to do one more gig, an annual event for charity. Chaos ensues, when a serial murderer comes to destroy the only person who might be able to identify him, Mystic. Together with Detective Steve Turner, Mystic is determined to flesh out the criminal, even though it means attending a BDSM event on a cruise under a different identity with no way out if things go wrong.
Ghoulish fun at Six Flags in Jackson, NJ
Since I always include a segment about the author and a recipe, let’s combine the two. I’m a huge fan of apple picking and apple cider-hot, cold, with alcohol… doesn’t matter-just love the stuff. Since I’ve picked up a gallon of apple cider which will last about a day with the imps in the house. It’s cocktail time for me.
Top Shelf Caramel Apple Cocktail-’cause you deserve the good stuff
Ingredients:
Ice
Apple Slices for Garnish
Chopin or Belvedere Vodka
Butterscotch Liqueur
Apple Liqueur
Apple Cider (to taste)
Caramel Drizzle
Fill tall glass with ice and add equal portions (1/2 jigger of each) of Vodka, Butterscotch Liqueur, and Apple Liqueur. Add apple cider to taste and drizzle over caramel for that syrupy sweet taste. Garnish with a slice of orchard fresh apple and serve.
We are just weeks away from the big day! As many of you know, this is my absolute favorite time of year. We’ve been picking apples at our favorite orchards. I’ve sampled some local wines at chocolate pairings… a girl must get her antioxidants and polyphenols, after all. The pups have gotten their costumes and the children have visited the costume store and some specialty online retailers for embellishments to theirs. My small skeleton is smiling from inside the front window and I have my orange and purple lights up. I’m pretty much finished decorating for the season, because my home is spooky year round.
This year, the family has adopted a divide and conquer mentality. Some will be trick-or-treating (weather permitting), some will be handing out sweets at home, and I’m handing out sweets at the mall this year with our martial arts school. I’ve even signed up for some spooky vending opportunities. You’d think I was all set for Halloween.
However, I’m not the traditional spooky Mom with inflatables and pumpkin spice lattes. I swap out haunted hayrides for time alone on completely empty beaches with a book or my work in progress and a hot apple cider. As the roar of the ocean booms over a silent beach, I’m home. There is much to be discovered in the stillness, and I always take time mentally preparing myself for big holidays. It’s a witchy thing, grounding yourself when you need to and I have my favorite ways to ground.
I know that the children will be excited for loot, seemingly ill gotten gains they politely ask for in the form of whatever delectable sugary sweetness is available. I have tiger pops this year and gummy brains, since an itty bitty mentioned a chocolate allergy last year. I also have spider rings and things that are completely sans sugar, since some trick or treaters can’t have any sugar at all. Still, despite the pleasure from seeing children run amuck in their alternate personas, my thoughts return to the family members and pooches that won’t be with us this year. My beloved dead are well cared for in my thoughts and there is not only the memory of the times that we shared held dear in my heart, but the ways in which they forever changed me. I’m kind of like a Frankenstein’s monster in that way, a collection of parts taken from other people and held precariously together.
However, I am exchanging my dumb supper for the mirth of children, something I know my beloved dead would have been most eager to see and hear and I will share that with them this year and for as many years as I drag this body around the earth. It’s my tribute to them in a way, as I know every doorbell ring would have got them up and to the door with candy, maybe not the dogs, but they would have barked their fool heads off in excitement. The thing about loving anyone (even a dog) is you feel their loss acutely, but you also remember their joy. To the matriarch and sister that showed me grace, to the aunt and uncle that showed me perseverance, and to the dogs that gave me endless affection, visit with joy when the veil thins and return with a little of our happiness.
Take a moment to remember your beloved, breath in their wisdom, breathe out despair, and then re-enter the world inspired.
Now, back to the mundane.
With the coming Nor’easter, I have my candles ready.
I have recently submitted a crossover book, something that bridges the gap between my All Tied Up In Knots Series and my Help Wanted Romance Series and now, I’m waiting for the gods of Amazon to release it officially, so I can bring you all the spicy and gory news of it’s arrival.
In the meantime, you have a moment to catch up on both series. Today I’m going to showcase the full length books in the All Tied Up In Knots series. Rope is near and dear to my heart, and I hope I’ve portrayed it in the best light. Rope suspension can be freeing and I hope you have a chance to experience it, whether it’s at a dungeon, a rope event, or one of the many rope shares.
Violet, a young acting student, sees her last chance to get picked for the lead role in the school’s stage production slipping away. Knowing that a talent scout will be there at the opening performance, she must win the lead and cement her chances for stardom or put the last nail in the coffin of her future as an actress.
“You can’t take directions! Seven performances, seven dress rehearsals, and you treat each play as if you personally wrote it.”
But there is still a glimmer of hope. Violet still has four weeks to re-fashion herself into a star, but it’s going to take more than learning lines. She has to reach into everything she has buried down deep inside and find out who she really is.
She meets Jericho Blythe, a strong attractive man, who after making a fortune on Wall Street, dedicated himself to pursuit of darker pleasures. He agrees to train her, if she gives him full control of every aspect of her life for the next critical four weeks.
Time is short but the romance between the two of them will either have them burning as hot as a bright star or leave them scorched forever.
Holly, a former runaway, returns to her hometown to reclaim her life, but it might prove more difficult than she thought. She was the only witness to a double homicide. Her father, a detective, and her mother are both gone and even though she was shot, Holly can’t recall any of the event at all.
Focusing on her future, Holly attends a local college, gets a part time job and is consumed with the desire to learn some fancy pyrotechnics from a renowned expert in the field. As fate would have it, Mr. Riley, is a master of more than one skill and soon she begins to fall for him.
Now that Holly is back and surrounded by people, places, and things from her past, the tumultuous memories begin to resurface. She begins to suspect that she might just be the killer and part of an elaborate cover up. She is torn between her desire for love and the fear of what she might be capable of. Will the truth set her free or destroy everyone she loves?
I always include a recipe of some sort with my blog, and instead of sitting down with a nice amaretto, I’m adding 1/2 shot to my cupcake batter-trust me it’s delicious.
I always include a recipe, and since we are a few weeks away from Halloween, this gives me the perfect chance to give you a super quick cupcake recipe-you can modify it to your taste and I have included some options below, but this is great if you have a school bake sale or just need a cupcake.
Ghost Cupcakes- so good they’ll disappear
Ingredients:
2 cups flour- I use unbleached
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt- you need it to bring out the sweet
1 stick unsalted butter (or 1/2 cup butter substitute)
3/4 cup granulated sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla sugar or vanilla extract
2 eggs
1 cup whole milk (or milk substitute-I use Lactaid, hubby prefers oat milk)
optional add-ins: a few drops food coloring, 1 bar melted dark chocolate, 1/4 cup coconut flakes, 1 Tablespoon amaretto (trust me, it’s delicious), 1Tablespoon lemon juice… just go with whatever flavor profile you’re in the mood for
supplies:
measuring cup/spoons
bowls
whisk or mixer
cupcake liners 20-24
cupcake baking pan
Hot to make it:
Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit (325 degrees Fahrenheit if using nonstick pans) or 177 degrees Celsius. Give it a good ten minutes or so to get warm.
In a large bowl, cream butter and sugar. You can do this by hand or with a mixer. If you are adding in some melted chocolate this is the time to do it.
Add in your vanilla and any liquid flavorings or coloring
Add eggs one a time (always check your eggs first). If you get a shell in, wet your finger and grab it out-works every time. If you want super light cupcakes, whip your egg whites and fold in wet ingredients before adding dry. There are just so many variations on the same recipe.
Combine your dry ingredients in a separate bowl and mix (sift if you light light airy cupcakes)
Add milk to your wet ingredients and mix until smooth. This is your last wet ingredient and you will start to stir in your dry ingredients next, so make sure your bowl is big enough to handle everything.
Gradually add in your dry ingredients 1 cup at a time and stir until incorporated. I try not to over stir as the gluten makes the cupcakes chewy instead of fluffy, but you need all of your flour and dry ingredients incorporated.
Sprinkle some rice onto the bottom of your cupcake baking tray in each space. This will stop the bottoms of your cupcakes from burning. Then, line cupcake baking pan with paper liners and add enough cake batter to fill 1/2 to 2/3 of the liner. The baking powder will make them fluff up so you want to leave some room so they don’t spill over and become one giant monster cupcake.
Bake at 350 degrees Fahrenheit for 15-25 minutes (this varies with your oven and altitude). You can check doneness with a toothpick(should come out clean) or but lightly touching surface. A cooked cupcake will spring back, a raw cupcake will compress.
Once done, let cupcakes cool on wire rack, so they don’t continue cooking in the hot pan.
Decorate with your favorite vanilla icing and chocolate jimmies or mini chocolate chips.
Hello my friends, today we will welcome novelist Michael Molloy, writer of romance and suspense, author of “The Acrimony of Matrimony,” a brand new romantic comedy set for debut on Sunday June 2nd on Amazon.
But first let us kick back and relax with his favorite drink, which is super appropriate when you pair it with his favorite food.
Here is a word from Michael J Molloy:
My favorite recipe is chicken parmigiana with fettuccine Alfredo. That’s my Italian side showing. I can eat that three days a week. My drink? With that meal, it’s got to be a glass of merlot. At other meals a bottle of Brooklyn Lager.
That’s right. Who ever said that you can only have one favorite drink? especially when enjoying it three times a week. Variety is the spice of life after all.
This time however, before we kick back and relax with the drink we must cook up some chicken parmigiana with fettucine alfredo.
Ingredients:
Chicken Parmesan
3 large chicken breasts (or 6 tenderloins)
2 cups panko bread crumbs
1 cup dry grated Parmesan cheese
1 tablespoon Italian seasoning
1 tsp. salt
2-3 large eggs
1 jar marinara sauce of choice (I like the Victoria or Rao’s brand)
fresh Parmesan for topping
flavorless oil for frying (canola, vegetable, etc.) (several cups)
Pasta
1 lb. fettuccine (or other long-cut pasta)
salt
Alfredo Sauce
3/4 cup unsalted butter (1.5 sticks)
3 cups heavy cream
2 cups fresh Parmesan cheese, grated or shaved (make sure to use fresh!)
1 teaspoon salt
Serving/Toppings
fresh basil
salt and pepper
extra grated Parmesan cheese
Instructions
Chicken Parmesan
Start by prepping your chicken. Place your chicken breasts or tenderloins in a large ziploc bag, 2-3 at a time. Using the flat side of a meat mallet (or side of a can or other heavy object), begin to flatten your meat.
After you flatten your meat, cut the pieces into similar sizes. I usually cut one large chicken breast in half after flattening.
Before cooking the chicken, you need to get your dredging station ready. Get out 2 low wide bowls or pie pans. In the first, crack 2 eggs and add 1-2 tablespoons of water. Whisk those together and set aside (I set it near my stovetop).
In another low, wide bowl, mix together Panko bread crumbs, dry grated Parmesan cheese, Italian seasoning, and salt. Set next to the egg mixture, near the stove top.
Next, prep your baking dish and oven. Turn the oven to 350°F. Get out a 9×13″ baking dish (or other wide, rimmed baking dish) and spray with cooking spray. Set aside.
In a large saucepan or heavy-bottomed pan, pour flavorless oil until it’s about 1 inch up the side of the pan. Depending on your pan size, the amount will vary.
Heat oil to a medium-high heat, until a sprinkle of water dropped in sizzles (will take about 5 minutes to heat up).
Once oil is hot, dredge your first 3 pieces of chicken, first by dipping in the egg mixture, and then into the breadcrumb mixture. Then carefully set each piece of dredged chicken into the hot oil, using tongs.
Let cook on each side for about 5-7 minutes. Each piece will take a different amount of time depending on the size and thickness. Once one side is browned and cooked, flip with tongs. Once chicken looks cooked, tap on the center with the back of the tongs, if it feels firm it’s probably cooked through. If you want to be sure, you can double check by making a slight cut with a sharp knife to ensure it’s cooked.
Once first batch is cooked through, remove and place in the prepared baking dish. If the oil starts to get too hot, you can turn it down to medium heat.
Once you start another batch of chicken, add a little more oil into the pan. Continue cooking until all the chicken is done. Place all chicken in prepared baking dish. Cover each piece of chicken with a couple spoonfuls of marinara sauce and then top with fresh Parmesan cheese.
Bake in preheated 350°F oven for 10-15 minutes until cheese melts and sauce is warmed through.
Pasta and Alfredo
While your chicken is baking, you’ll have time to get your pasta and Alfredo ready. Start by heating a large pot full of water over high heat.
Meanwhile, in a separate medium saucepan, add butter for Alfredo sauce. Whisk until melted. Once melted, add in heavy cream. Once mixture comes to a simmer, add in fresh Parmesan and salt, whisking constantly until melted together and smooth and creamy. Once thick and smooth, remove from heat and set aside. You will have extra sauce – I do this on purpose so I can add it to the leftover pasta when we reheat it.
Once pasta water is boiling, salt generously and add pasta. Stir pasta constantly while it’s cooking so it doesn’t stick. Cook pasta until just barely done, then strain and top with Alfredo sauce. Remove chicken from oven.
Serve pasta on plate topped with Parmesan Chicken. You can add extra marinara sauce or Alfredo to the table if anyone wants to top with more. Top with fresh parm and basil if desired – enjoy!
Notes
It really helps to have a meat mallet to pound out/thin your chicken before frying it. If the chicken is thinner it will cook more evenly, and will cook through without the crispy edges burning.
If you don’t have a meat mallet, try using a large rolling pin or some canned food, on its side.
Wow! After all this cooking, I hope we have enough to last us till Sunday, when we finally would be able to kick back with the new book. For now let us get our appetite going:
“The Acrimony of Matrimony”: A bungling young marriage counselor has difficulties bridging the differences of feuding husbands and wives, but he overlooks his own shortcomings in his long-term relationship with his girlfriend
Excerpt:
CHAPTER 12
With his veins on end as he stared at his mail order watch, Gavin’s forehead poured out beads of sweat. It wasn’t as a result of the humid eighty-three temperatures. No, not with the air conditioner on at full blast. He squirmed in his office chair wondering where his two o’clock appointment for that Thursday afternoon was. It was bad enough he pledged a commitment to attend the meeting with other marriage counselors that evening. He didn’t need to appear as a frayed mess when shaking their hands that night, although he was already quivering from zigzagging nerves.
Two twelve. With a deep sigh, Gavin rested his chin on his open right palm while staring at the window as if it was going to help get his clients in the office lickety-split. The fingers on his left hand marched to the cadence of a caterpillar to exacerbate the lateness.
Then a subtle knock on the door startled Gavin out of his skin. A bug-eyed glance at the door preceded an anxious clearing of the throat. In a raspy tone, Gavin called out to the party to enter.
The knob turned in stealth slowness. Gavin had enough anxiety vibrating his body for the afternoon. The tension mounted as the door opened in the measured speed of a sundial’s shadowy path. The head of a young man appeared like a prairie dog checking out his surroundings. In bewilderment, the man with a healthy head of black hair spoke up.
“Excuse me, are you Mr. McGuiness?” the young man inquired.
“Uh.” Gavin hesitated as he searched his wallet for his driver’s license to assure himself. “Yeah, that’s…that’s me. But you can call me Gavin. And you must be Chase Haglund.”
“Yes, that’s right.”
“Come in and have a seat.”
“Thank you.”
Chase came into full view as Gavin checked him out. The counselor’s new client was a strapping figure over six feet tall with distinguished chiseled handsome features. In his wake was an attractive woman with sandy brown hair flowing over her shoulders. Gavin noticed her holding up her left palm at someone in the hallway before closing the door behind her.
“This is my wife, Vickie.”
“Hello,” Vickie quietly addressed Gavin.
As Vickie entered the room, Gavin eyed her scanning the office. She ambled over to a corner and pulled across a chair, which she then placed in between the two seats meant for a husband and wife. Gavin’s Picasso face stamped his confusion over the odd behavior.
“Gee,” Gavin opened. “I know there’s some friction between the two of you, but you really don’t have to separate each other like you just did. I mean, the whole point of this session is to bring the two of you together. This doesn’t help it any.”
“I’ll explain in a while,” Vickie said passively.
Gavin squirmed in his seat, crisscrossing his fingers as he volleyed his sights on the couple. Chase looked out to the right and Vickie the left. The counsellor shifted his eyebrows, releasing a subtle sigh, wondering how much longer the stalemate would continue. Time to break the ice.
“Okay, friends.” Gavin slapped his palms on the desk. “Let’s get to the root of the issue.”
Vickie swiveled in her seat, facing Gavin head-on. With a pronounced sneer, she pointed at Chase, avoiding eye contact away with her husband.
“The bastard cheated on me!”
Chase turned to Gavin with extended arms.
“No,” Chase rebutted. “It was an honest mistake.”
“Uh, I don’t see how having an affair as being an honest mistake, Chase.” Gavin then turned to Vickie for the full story.
“A month ago,” Vickie began, “I came home early from an errand. I walked into our apartment and I found him screwing another woman!”
Chase cupped his hands as if in prayer, pleading to Gavin to hear his side. “She’s not telling you everything. You don’t have the complete picture.”
“I think I do,” Gavin countered. “This is some serious crap, my friend.”
Chase’s reddened scowl spoke volumes as he pivoted toward Vickie.
“Why don’t you show him what I’m talking about?”
Vickie pouted as she shrugged her shoulders. Twisting her slender figure as far as she could to her left, she shouted to the top of her lungs. “Okay, Tara, you can come in!”
Gavin reclined deep in his seat, curious as to where all of this mess was heading to. The person in the hallway made her appearance. Gavin’s eyes popped out of his head as the woman coming into the office bore a striking resemblance to Vickie.
“This is my identical twin sister, Tara,” Vickie deadpanned.
Gavin’s jaw dropped as his eyes volleyed from Vickie to Tara and back again. No, he wasn’t seeing things. But there were measurable differences. Whereas as Vickie wore her dark blonde hair straight down, Tara had hers done up in pigtails. Vickie hardly had any make-up on, but Tara painted her modest cheekbones in red rouge with eyeliner and mascara that could be seen for miles. Vickie’s attire amounted to a conservative sky-blue blouse with black pants to round things out. Tara wore a short-sleeved tee with dazzling pastels and hot pink shorts to complete her Kewpie doll appearance. And while Vickie shuffled into Gavin’s workspace, Tara pranced in on her tiptoes, clinging on to her gold lame change purse, clutched close to her belly. Tara placed herself gingerly on the chair, sandwiched in between her sister and her brother-in-law.
Gavin still had difficulty fathoming the exact basic features of the two women. Even as simplemindedas he was, the counselor had a gut feeling where this was going to.
“Well, then,” Gavin began “we do have an issue here. Vickie?”
“Like I said, I came home one day, and I found Chase screwing Tara’s brains out.”
Chase raised his right hand for a word in edgewise.
“Can I just say something?” He peeked around Tara to stare at his wife. “I thought she was you!”
“Oh c’mon!”
“She dressed like you. Wore her hair down. Even spoke like you – you know, not as perky as Tara usually talks.”
“Oh, yeah? Well, did you happen to notice the heart tattoo on her ass?”
“You’ve got a heart tattoo?” Gavin asked.
“Oh, yeah,” Tara giggled. “I had it done a few years ago.”
“Well, I’ve got a friend who’s got one of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on his right bicep. It’s really cool. I think it’s Donatello.”
“Wow! Would you like to see my tattoo?” Tara was about to rise to unbutton her shorts, but Vickie quickly intervened.
“Please! Let’s not go there!” Vickie extended her left arm to force Tara to take her seat. The ditzy twin turned up her nose at her sister.
“Well, Chase,” Gavin began, “Vickie does have a point. You didn’t see that tattoo?”
“Look, Gavin, I’ve seen Vickie’s ass quite a number of times. I just took it for granted.”
“Oh!” Vickie exclaimed. “So now you’re getting tired of my naked body, huh?”
“That’s not what I meant! I love you whether you have clothes on or not.” Chase turned to Gavin while pointing at Tara. “She tricked me!”
“Yeah, but you have me a great orgasm, Chase,” Tara threw a wry smile at her brother-in-law. “You’ll have to admit, I give a louder scream than my sister.”
“Well, I at least act and dress my age of thirty-three,” Vickie argued. “You’re still reliving your teenage years!”
“Yeah, but how many men did you fuck before Chase. Two? Maybe three?” Tara turned to Gavin. “I did at least twenty-five! I lose track, though.”
“This is getting sickening!” Vickie yelled, pounding the chair’s armrest to prove her point.
“Oh, and by the way, sis, you were right. Chase is long and hard.”
“That does it! I’m getting out of here!”
Gavin sprang up to motion Vickie to sit back down.
“Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!” Gavin commanded. “Let’s all get our heads together here.”
Chase bowed his head down with a subtle nod. Tara looked off into a corner with her lips twisted and arms folded across her chest. Vickie stared at the opposite corner with a reddened scowl. Peace was sort of restored. At least the vitriol wasn’t being exchanged back and forth.
“Now, Chase, the fact that you didn’t notice Tara’s…uh…well…assets, lends me to believe some complacency may have set in. You ought to let Vickie know that you don’t take her for granted. What about surprising her with flowers for no special reason? That’s one way of doing it.”
Chase softly nodded at the counselor’s suggestion.
“Vickie, while I can’t condone what Chase did, I can understand how he got duped into thinking Tara was you, tattoo or no tattoo. She put on a good performance that anyone could’ve made a similar mistake. I mean, if it was a brunette Chase was with, well, you might have a case there. But Tara played her role as you to a tee. I say you should cut him some slack here.”
“Humph! That’s probably how she stole Devon McGwire away from me in high school.”
“Who? Me?” Tara stretched her fingers across her chest.
Vickie tilted her head up to the far corner of the room while Tara shrugged her shoulders and gazed at her golden wallet.
“And as for you, Tara.” Gavin leaned across his desk with one eye squinted and the other wide as a saucer. “Perhaps you ought to take a closer look at yourself. I sort of agree with Vickie. Trying to relive your teenager years in your thirties might be a little, shall I say, weird. Maybe if you dialed down the craziness you might have a special man in your life. And who knows where that might lead to.”
“Hmm.” Tara flirted with batting eyes. “What are you doing this Saturday?”
“I…uh…I do go out with someone. She and I have been together for ten years.”
“Ten years, huh? Then how come there’s no ring around your finger? I would think you and her would’ve been married by now.”
“Well, we’re working on it.”
Gavin slapped his hands down on his desk as he brought an end to the session. He spotted Chase grabbing Vickie around her waist. Gavin took satisfaction that the couple buried the hatchet in resolving their marital upheaval. The counselor beamed as Chase and Vickie exited the office. Tara was about to follow them when she suddenly stopped in her tracks. She pivoted and sashayed back to Gavin, taking him by surprise.
She whipped out a pen from her little change satchel and proceeded to scribble down on a small piece of paper.
“Here.” Tara smiled, finishing her writing and handing Gavin the slip. “That’s my number in case you’re in need of a little action.”
Tara puckered her lips and kissed the air before flashing her pearly whites. Gavin shot a wavy smile back at the tart as the latter followed her sister’s tracks.
The counselor plopped back in his chair as he was back to his lonesome self. Tara’s slip of paper? Well, Gavin gave it a good look before crumpling it up and tossing it in the waste can next to his seat.
He slumped like a sack of potatoes when, suddenly, he received an alert on his iPhone.
We look forward to seeing you at our marriage counselor group tonight at 7 pm!
A little reminder for Gavin that he was in need of forgoing watching Jeopardy! for the evening. He actually didn’t need that vibrating buzz to yank himself into Manhattan. Indeed, Gavin was very much looking forward to trading war stories with fellow practitioners. Maybe they also encountered ambulance chasers, clowns, operatic sopranos, and identical twins. Or was he the only counselor in town to attract this unique list of eccentric clientele?
About the Author:
A fan of authors Stephen King and Nicholas Sparks, I didn’t get the writing bug until about 20 years ago. I was influenced greatly by an English teacher I had during my years at Stuyvesant High School – Frank McCourt.
I have two traditionally published books to my credit, both through Gypsy Shadow Publishing. One is a contemporary romance novel entitled “The Diamond Man”. The second is a suspense novel called “Sadistic Pattern”, which was voted as a top-five book by Apple iTunes in April, 2019. I published another contemporary romance novel in 2021 entitled “Sweet Greetings from Carthage” and I’m now out with a women’s fiction story called “Allison Tinsley”. You can learn more about these books by going to my Amazon author page (http://www.amazon.com/author/michaeljmolloy). I’m also a musician as I’m the organist for the New York Aviators USPHL hockey team.
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